This blog is about love despite a prenatal diagnosis, grief & healing after baby loss, hope, faith, pregnancy after loss and Hydrops Fetalis awareness.

Saturday, December 30, 2017

Christmas 2017

I was so spoiled this year!  Hand made gifts from my 2nd and 6th grader.  Handmade gorgeous painting from my first born, now an adult.  Those gifts are truly my favorites!  My 8 year old was so excited to be preparing his gifts!  It was cuter than cute to witness.  My 11 year old was quiet but knew I would love her handmade present!  I know my oldest had put a lot of time and love to make my gift.  I was not aloud to enter bedroom for over a month!

Looking at my Christmas tree, it came to my mind that when I lost Lily, I also lost that kindergarten Christmas handmade ornament that I've collected from all my children on the year that they were 5.  I lost all the other love filled hand made ornements that would have followed in the years after. 

Of course, this is only a small detail in our lives on this earth. I will not bring any of these adorable keepsakes with me when I'm gone.  They won't matter. I simply wonder what colors she would have picked, what her personal touch would have been.  How her handmade gifts would have turned out.

But I also received a special ornement from my mother this Christmas!  Every year, my mom gives each one of us a Christmas ornement to add to our tree.  It was so thoughtful of her to give me one with Lily's name on it.  It really means a lot to me that my girl was remembered this way.

Merry Christmas in Heaven baby girl!  Until we meet again and you show me the colors that are yours...

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"Children are a gift from God, babies are a reward." Ps 127.3